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Life Beyond Therapy: Sigmund Freud goes to Palm Springs

For many of us LGBT San Diegans, this is the perfect time to go to Palm Springs: it’s not too hot and just far enough away to feel like we've had an adventure.

I was thinking recently of what it would be like if Sigmund Freud — the famous psychoanalyst — were alive today and joined me for a weekend in Palm Springs. He and I would sit by the pool at an LGBT-friendly resort during White Party weekend, margaritas in hand, watching the boys and girls go by. Here’s what Sigmund might say:

Male victims of campus sexual assault speak out

Note: The following story contains descriptions of sexual assault that some readers might find upsetting.

It was Andrew's sixth night of freshman year at Brown University when he was assaulted by a male student in his dorm bathroom. When Andrew brought on-campus charges, his assailant was expelled.

Unlike myriad students who report mishandled cases in the burgeoning national campaign against sexual assault, Andrew initially believed his case was handled appropriately.

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Life Beyond Therapy: "Eternal boy" syndrome

This week, I was talking to a client who is a smart, successful and happily-married bisexual woman in her early 30s.

We were talking about her worries and fears when suddenly she surprised me.

“I know it sounds weird, but I don’t want to grow up,” she said. “I want to be like Wendy in Peter Pan. Growing up sounds boring. Do I have to?”

I think this highly-accomplished woman is speaking for all of us. Do we have to grow up? And what does “growing up” mean anyway?

Life Beyond Therapy: Cleaning up

When I was a brand new therapist, I used to think that New Year’s resolutions were a good idea.

Now – years later — I see the truth.

For the vast majority of people, New Year’s resolutions are not useful and often make us feel worse, because 99.99 percent of the time we can’t follow through with them.

Instead, I recommend that my clients use the end of the old year/start of a new one to “clean up.” With a nice, new year we want a nice, “clean” life, don’t we? Isn’t that the point of all those “resolutions” we’ve made in the past?

Canada: Crisis hotline set up to help shunned transgender youth

OTTAWA, Canada -- A new Canadian crisis hotline is helping transgender youth who have come out to their families and been shunned – a particularly vulnerable community with staggering rates of depression and suicide.

Launched Dec. 12 in Canada after toll-free lines opened in late November in the United States, Trans Lifeline is exclusively for transgender people and staffed entirely by transgender operators. With nearly 60 volunteers working worldwide across many time zones and 350 more signed up for training, it’s the first helpline with this level of specificity.

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Life Beyond Therapy: "I hate the holidays"

A recent email I got sums up many people’s attitude towards this time of year.

Dear Dr. Kimmel:

I hate the Holidays! People are so fake and everyone competes with each other for the best gifts, best parties, best tree decorations, etc. What can I do to get through this falsely festive time of year?


Depressed Already in Bankers Hill

Dear Depressed:

Former "ex-gay" poster boy: "I won't be a weapon anymore"

Christian Schizzel spent 7 years being trotted around the country on media outlets as a poster boy for the ex-gay movement. Now, after reclaiming his gay identity, Christian says he won’t be a weapon anymore.

Father supported by Reddit users after asking for advice to support gay son

Earlier the month, Reddit users took a stand for LGBT equality, overwhelming supporting a dad who wanted his teenage son to openly live his truth.

Legally married gay couples won’t be allowed to stay together at shelter

KANSAS CITY, Missouri -- For 90 years, the City Union Mission in the heart of Kansas City has given a roof, meals and warm beds to homeless individuals and families in need.

That fact alone, said executive director Dan Doty, makes its most recent decision regarding same-sex couples and their families all the harder.

Even if same-sex marriage becomes legal in both Missouri and Kansas — a matter now working its way through the courts — same-sex couples will not be allowed to stay as couples at City Union Mission’s family shelter.

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Life Beyond Therapy: Healthy boundaries

If you listen to any kind of psychological advice show — from Dr. Phil to Dr. Drew — you’ll hear the therapist talking about “healthy boundaries.” A boundary is a marker, a dividing line. It tells me where my property stops and yours starts. Psychologically, it tells me when something is OK with me and when it’s not.