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So, I just made it out of the ladies' room unscathed. This is a daily stress for me. Allow me to explain.
For a butch, using a public restroom is one of the worst things.
I don't present myself as a typical woman, right? And, I certainly am no lady.
This makes a trip into the ladies' room a lot like a trip across enemy lines.
I try to get in, take care of business, wash my hands, and get out as fast as possible - without getting shot.
Speed is key, because it reduces the amount of time in "enemy territory" and lessens the likelihood that a woman will stare at me in shock, appalled that she might be in the men's room.
Forget taking the time to check my hair or put on Chapstick. There is no time for lounging in the ladies lounge.
I have had all manner of reactions over the years. Sideways glances. Mild discerning looks. Gasps of shock. Accusations like: "You are in the wrong restroom," "Oh dear, the men's room is over there," and the kicker, "Mommy, why is that man in the girls' room?"
I've had women stop in their tracks as they walk in the restroom, back up, open the door, and look at the sign. Then, once they are sure they are in the right place, resume staring at me. How fun is that?
I just have to take a pee, but I have to run the gauntlet, bear down, grit my teeth, and get through it as fast as possible. It sucks to feel like I have to apologize for peeing.
Over the years, I've developed quite a few strategies for minimizing the damage:
Let me know if you have any other strategies. Be nice to a butch walking into the restroom. Oh, and more unisex or family restrooms would be awesome - in case any architects are reading this. (Ha!)
It is very butch to escort your friend to the restroom.
ButchOnTap is written by "Butch Jaxon," who while a lesbian her whole life, is still a fledgling writer. Butch was raised in San Diego and is an accomplished lawyer. She loves to write, play any kind of sport or game, consume any kind of entertainment, and is frequently found drinking lattes in a bookstore or discovering new beers at local micro-breweries. You can get additional drafts of Butch at her blog, ButchonTap.com. You can visit also visit and like Butch on Facebook. To tell Butch what you think, email her at firstname.lastname@example.org or comment below.